9 Reasons Why Being a Sneakerhead Sucks | Grailify
9 Reasons Why Being a Sneakerhead Sucks

9 Reasons Why Being a Sneakerhead Sucks

Enough celebrating sneaker culture, here comes the truth. We are completely NUTS! Let's face it: rents are skyrocketing and we're giving away half our living space to store shoes. But that's not the only reason it sucks to be a sneakerhead - here's our full list of 9! On a side note, before you jump out the window, know that we're in this together.

1. You're always broke.
Face it, you own the largest sneaker collection in Western Civilisation and judging by your Acronym jacket and Stone Island jumper, you must be a filthy rich mfckr. But there's one little thing that separates you from the real upper class (with cars and houses) - the money is ALMOST gone.

2. Girls love you - well, theoretically.
No doubt about it, girls love guys who "like sneakers". That's because they have no idea what "into" really means. But you'll teach them eventually, and then they'll be gone. Romantic beach holiday? No, because you'd rather freeze your gently rolled jeans off outside the shops with your equally addicted friends. Now add to that the fact that you can't spare the money to entertain a lady with style - and about the extra space in the flat ....

3. You're in bad shape.
Come on, let's put things in perspective: You're into running (the shoes) and basketball (the shoes) and know all the cushioning systems by heart, but you never do anything but check how well they go with the rest of your outfit. You look like shit while the rest of society is working out at the gym.

4. You don't do any other activities.
In theory (!) you're a pretty cool guy. You were into graffiti and skateboarding when you were young, you like cool bikes (to look at), but you would never do those activities again because: They mess up your footwear, BIG time. And that's the last thing you want.

5. You have no space.
It's great that you dedicate an entire room to your collection and use the rest of the flat for sneaker art. You know what's left then? Nothing. Unless you were born rich, your flat will pretty much suck because you don't have a living space that isn't covered in leather, suede and mesh. Do you think girls like that? See point 2 on this topic.

6. You're all about money.
This is the inevitable result of your addiction: Trading is part of the game and buying and selling is your daily business because you are not rich yet. This messes up your character because all the trading goes to your head. 7.

7. You are online all the time.
Are you afraid of missing the next big sale? Need to answer some KLEKT messages? Oh, and use Paypal? You haven't checked Instagram in three minutes? We get it, our society is super addicted to mobile phones - but you're the worst addict ever.

8. Your state of mind is WANT.
As humans, we've been programmed to experience a feeling when we're hunting for food or other essentials to survive (!). You're pretty much in this mode all day and your heart is on high frequency to get your hands on pretty much anything you can: Sneakers, streetwear, coffee, stickers, bikes, socks. Oh, and yes, hamburgers too. Please check number 3 again to see what shape you're in.

9. It's all for the Gram.
Want to see how exciting life is? Check out normal people's Instagram accounts. They document things like travel (without business), people, family, dinner (sometimes home cooked), dogs and smiles (without publications). You know the variables in your life? Different shoes from different angles. But you know what? There's probably no money left for a holiday anyway, because .... see number 1.
 
Illustration: Josh Parkin 

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